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wrandomness and divinity |
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Always random, always approaching divine...
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wMay 18, 2002 |
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keeping it alive. see? while you´re here, and if you´re here, check out my other site: The McGuirk World Tour. Peace. Much love. Outtie.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 1:40 PM
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wSeptember 16, 2001 |
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I am such a spoiled fuck.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 11:43 PM
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wSeptember 07, 2001 |
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God that sucked. If only I could write.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 3:01 PM
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wSeptember 01, 2001 |
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Belated Response to Game #4
I get into these modes every once in a while, where all that exists is what I focus on. Literally, the periphery of my vision will fall away, and all that exists for me in that moment is whatever I've focused on. It's an odd feeling. Most of the time it's brought on by my own normal, deep-seated mysticism and concentration, but this morning, at this ungodly hour, it's brought on by alcohol. My focal point is the rotating, steaming surface of a scalding cup of coffee. The bubbles form galaxies and spin, they dance and collide and shatter and come back together in this, my cosmic cup of coffee. On so many scales, worlds are colliding and shattering. Thus the Mardi-Gras-like party last night. It wasn't a party. It was a binge. College kids call it a party because it's fun, it's primal and communal. For me it's primal, yea, but in a subduing my own rage sort of way. Last night wasn't a party, it was an escape, which is really sort of pathetic. Escape from what? I'm fucking rich, I'm fucking sexy, I drive a fucking cool car, have never been starving in my life, except when I wanted to be. I guarantee you that there are people in Africa somewhere who have not eaten in weeks, have very recently lost close family members to a slow, dignity stealing disease or hunger or both. I'm a spoiled fuck. The only thing I should escape from is my own selfishness and arrogance... A three year old just broke my zen moment there. The rest of the world has reclaimed my vision. Cute kid. I suppose at three years old, you should run as much and as often as physically possible. Oh, to be three again. A three year old is joy defined. A three year old lives life joyously, and gives joy universally. A three year old is an undeniable good thing, even those annoying little fucks at Italian resteraunts that spill and throw their pasta and won't stop crying. Even then, you have to give them credit for being what they are, and even when they are terrible (which continues past the terrible twos), they are joyous because they are young and naive and untouched and beautiful, despite being covered, head to foot, in some oily gourmet italian sauce and standing on their toes in a kiddie chair just to make their precarious displeasure known. Even then. Even then... I look back to the coffee. The galaxy is slowing down, becoming more stable. It still crashes into the sides every once in a while, but it's orbit is centered. So things can return. Things can come back down from heights, galaxies can recover after having collided and exploded and changed. Life can go on. I guess that's the only constant, really. Time and life will go on, whether you join them or not. Every second is a new interesection, every second history is being dictated. Every second holds literally billions of possibilities. Escape. Maybe I should escape. Not down, not out, with drink and pain, but up and through. Comon, God. Pour in some sugar and stir my fucking coffee. See if I fucking care.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 3:36 AM
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I need a jack daniels and a cigar.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 3:05 AM
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You ever known something so true, seen something so blinding and righteous that those around you mistake it for a camera flash or a hand grenade? Ever known someone so well, seen something coming for so long, and prayed, hope against velocity, that it wouldn't happen? Ever loved someone tell it hurt? Ever done ridiculous things to forget one person, all of which made you remember them the more? Ever have light filter through a cloud and wonder what color someone's eyes are, far away, as a result? Ever look at the moon, or listen to a light rainfall, and be instantly linked to another soul, despite distance, despite barriers, manmade, psychological and developmental, it doesn't matter? Have you ever sat still on the phone and had the wind knocked out of you?
Have you ever wished for rain, just to match your mood?
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 2:57 AM
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Is it getting better, or do you feel the same?
Will it make it easier on you, now you got someone to blame?
You say one love, one life, when it's one need in the night
One love, we get to share it
Leaves you baby if you don't care for it
Did I disappoint you or leave a bad taste in your mouth?
You act like you never had love, and you want me to go without
Well it's too late tonight to drag the past out into the light
We're one, but we're not the same
We get to carry each other, carry each other... one
Have you come here for forgiveness
Have you come to raise the dead
Have you come here to play Jesus to the lepers in your head
Did I ask too much, more than a lot
You gave me nothing, now it's all I got
We're one, but we're not the same
Well, we hurt each other, then we do it again
You say love is a temple, love a higher law
Love is a temple, love the higher law
You ask me to enter, but then you make me crawl
And I can't be holding on to what you got, when all you got is hurt
One love, one blood, one life, you got to do what you should
One life with each other: sisters, brothers
One life, but we're not the same
We get to carry each other, carry each other
One, one...
-U2
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 2:47 AM
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wAugust 31, 2001 |
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thanks ms. joyce.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 10:00 AM
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wJuly 10, 2001 |
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Herald Sun: Genital-biting fish terrorise village [ 06jul01 ]
I know we try to be deep and philosophical on this site, but remember, it is randomness and divinity. This thing just cracked me up. I mean, I feel bad for all involved, horrible actually, but just look at that headline and try not to laugh.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 10:20 PM
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Game #2: Bone-numbing cold. A jagged, purple scar. 11:17am. Red nail polish.
It always started the same: Gunfire. A house on fire. Enlarged grotesque shadows of horrible acts thrown on walls. A throbbing pain on a bare left ankle. Unmasterable shivers in the bone-numbing cold. A look to the sky, where the moon peeked through clouds and snow to shine light on darkness and death and pain. Then, still in the dream, she always saw herself close her eyes. The pain went away, the sounds faded, echoing like a "hello" shouted down a cave.
This time she woke up to complete darkness. A part of her thought this was a new stage of the dream. The normal cynic in her realized that it was and it wasn't. She wasn't asleep, so she wasn't dreaming in that sense. She remembered shutting all the blinds and shutters and draping heavy curtains over the last pervading attempts of the liquid-like light to invade her privacy. Complete darkness was reality challenging, and thus a good thing. Like Fight Club, she thought, thinking of the movie she had heard the audio of the previous evening as her mind and body concentrated on other activities. The darkness forced her to recognize that reality existed regardless of whether or not she could see it. She liked where that thought took her. She moved, stretched. She felt her whole body ache. In one of those inexplicable and uncontrollable motions, where the conscious mind relegates motion to the id for playtime, she reached her hands down her back. She felt the jagged, purple scar in the exact middle of her shoulders. The dream...
"Oh shit, do I have to work today?" she asked the darkness. She ran for where she guessed the blinds to be. She was off by a foot and slammed her hand into the wall, which provoked more curses from her. When the light finally poured into the room, and she had recovered from the initial blindness, she looked at the non-Indiglo, non-alarmed watch he had left on the desk. Her still blurred vision did not permit her to see it correctly. One hand was out to the right side, another towards the top... she thought. She blinked repeatedly, to try and deluge the blurriness with clarifying tears. The blurriness would have none of that though, and she unintentionally bent an eyelash into her eye, which made her drop the watch and curse again.
"Now I'm really fucking blind..." she said, and stumbled over things on her way to the shower.
Ten minutes later, she looked at herself in the mirror. The blazing sunshine threw reflected patterns on the wall. What she first perceived to be misladen paint was actually the reflection of her imprinted name badge: aleK. She rotated her torso to play with the light. She smiled, and glanced at the now uncovered digital clock on the floor below her bed: 11:17AM, it blinked. Her smile faded. The clock was blinking. It only blinked if it hadn't been reset since a power outage. Apparently it had been eleven hours and seventeen--eighteen, she noted--minutes since the power went out. She looked out the window again and noted the sun's position. It was one of those rare spring days in a new city where she really had no idea whether it was setting or rising. It was a surreal feeling to not know whether the view was of a sunset or a sunrise. Reality challenging even. She supposed she had to go outside and find out what time it was and what meal she should be eating.
She turned back to her unkind room, where bad dreams reigned after the lights went out. She shivered. She felt her back. The dream...
She glanced at her makeup cabinet, where she had jokingly labeled colors for days of the week, and other specifics. The bold red nail polish label read "SEX." She thought of High Fidelity, and how John Cusack had always dreamed of being surrounded by exotic women's underwear, but how he now knew that women only wore the good stuff on nights they knew they'd be having sex. Yea, she thought to herself, that's about right.
She skipped over "SEX," "BEACH," and "RAVE," and went right to "TUESDAY." It was Tuesday, right? She glanced over at a half-fallen wall calendar. She did the complex mental calculus needed, and she moved her hand back to "WEDNESDAY." What had happened to tuesday?
Then again, what had happened to a lot of things? Why did she have a recurring dream instead of a childhood? Why did she cry herself to sleep? Why could she never stay in one place? Why did she always look over her shoulder, even in her room alone with all the windows and doors closed? Why had the sun not moved since she last looked at it? Why did freedom seem so limiting? Why did it always end the same?
Why was she alone in the world?
Game #3: Start the Commotion by the Wise Guys on a radio, an bar overlooking an ocean vista, a ghetto roller with black lights under the chassis, an underwater discovery. Don't be obvious.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:23 AM
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wJune 24, 2001 |
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I'll post my game response in a minute, but just check out this shit: Rotating circles trick
It's crazy. If someone can tell me why that works, I will love them forever.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 11:44 PM
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wJune 12, 2001 |
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I wish Al Gore were Dick Cheney. Al Gore looks like he could be a very good behind-the-scenes operator. He looks like he could be the hatchet man, the silent organizer, the loyal footsoldier general, and be excellent in that role, but he sure does suck at being front man. He's just not built for it. Clinton, I think, recognized this, and I would not be surprised if that was the way he presented his vice-presidential offer to him: "Listen, I can move people. I can inspire. I can be charismatic. You can't. You absolutely can't, and in the back of your head you know this and you live your life to suit your skills, as do I. That said, you have good vision, good potential, and could take the vice-presidency higher. We could be a great team, but let me lead, be out in front." And I think that probably worked. But I'm pretty pissed off at the democrats for not nominating someone more charismatic and presentable. I know, it's horrible that we have gotten to this level, where we want our politicians to be like our rock stars and movie stars, but for the love of God, at least a democrat would be in the white house. Bush is destroying the universe. There is no possibility that he will have a positive impact on the country as a whole. The rich will do everything they can to reelect him. He'll be their best buddy. He'll destroy the environment while pumping more oil and giving them a great percentage of their incomes back to them. The rich will then turn the entire force of their media empires, their money, their influence, towards getting him back in office. The poor, the uneducated, who do as their beloved media tells them, will follow blindly to the polls. The forces of righteousness and freedom need someone amazingly inspirational and charismatic to counteract the effects of mass marketing. This savior better jump on the scene, and quickly, because we're getting closer and closer to crunch time. Someone needs to emerge as an undeniable front runner, a righteous, moral leader concerned for THE PEOPLE. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T FORGET THE PEOPLE.
Sorry, did that sound a bit anarchistic and alarmist? I didn't mean it that way... really...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 7:49 PM
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The religious right is neither.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 7:23 PM
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Game #1: A warm pint of guinness, moving shadows waking someone up, Memphis, TN, a conscious wrong decision. Don't be obvious. Good luck.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 7:21 PM
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wJune 08, 2001 |
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Occasionally, the line "What fools these mortals be..." pops into my head, when the situations that I find in myself in are just too ridiculous for words, and I truly see the limitations of the human creature.
I also have a distinct relationship with God (don't worry, these two will come together shortly). We talk. Literally. God angers me occasionally, and vice versa, but always the communication. This weekend, I found myself extremely angry with God. He did something random and painful to many, and to what end? I know no one speaks ill of people after they've gone, out of respect, but there are different levels of missing people. There's the respectful "I'm sorry for their loss," up to an uncontrollable emotional schism of souls.
A young life was taken a way, and lives were ripped open. We cannot know the effect of one person on the world around us. The variables are too numerous. Maybe this girl could have grown up and been a Neo-Hitler, but I seriously fucking doubt it. Some good better come out of this, God, are you will have lost me. I'm dead fucking serious. You had no right. It was just an ego trip and you know it. People can't see you because they're too braindead and sidetracked so you send down the fire and brimstone and car accidents. Well fuck you. Some tangible good better result from this. Worlds had better change, and for the better. Too many people have already been hurt from your little incindeary taunting. "What fools these deities be..." Prick.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:19 AM
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wMay 31, 2001 |
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driving late at night
with the stars above my head
relieves nothing now
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 1:00 AM
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I found my glasses today, after looking for them for a long time. I had my prom yesterday. It was a disaster. Yet today, I found my glasses. Today I found clarity in an increasingly blurry world. Hopefully clarity in vision will portend clarity in life.
If I have clarity in life, everything else will fall into place.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:40 AM
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wMay 29, 2001 |
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"Those emails are gonna be worth something some day." -Emelie.
Wow do we both have ego problems. If you're even reading thus, Internet public at large, can you give us a holla? mannix2k@hotmail.com or circe10@hotmail.com . Just tell us that you're fucking listening.
Thanks.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:48 AM
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wMay 24, 2001 |
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Was John Lennon wrong? Did that fucker lie? Is love not all you need? Do you need love and the right circumstances and compatible personalities and similar ambitions and political views? Or do you just need love? Do you really need to be in the right place and time for love to work? Or can we, if we possess it, use the brute strength of love to just pound through obstacles that stand in the way? Or is there like a prerequisite maturity level? Love can't work between two people until one of them climbs the wall and can see the yard next door? I don't fucking buy that.
Then why is it true?
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:57 AM
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What think ye of unbounded knowledge and morality in this situation: a man kisses a beautiful woman but thinks only of another woman whom he does not currently possess, but goes through with the first ordeal anyway out of a need to have something rather than the nothign he cannot have.
Is that so horrible? Will that man be condemned for all time for loving two people at the same time but in entirely different ways? Please God inform me, tell me what the fuck that man should do, because I sure as hell can't figure it out.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:45 AM
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We've all heard the joke about the blowjob and the cup of coffee, but, no joke, that's all I really want right now.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:42 AM
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If anyone can email me and tell me what the fuck the Maimonides were, without looking it up, you'll get something cool, so help me God.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:40 AM
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If someone dies on the exact date and time that deathclock.com says they should, their family should get like a million dollars or something.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:39 AM
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wMay 22, 2001 |
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Music is biorythmic. It has a profound effect on me. It is the soundtrack to my life. I don't need drugs to know what people on ecstacy feel like. When I DJ, when I listen to loud music in a crowd of hundreds of people, I feel the bass go directly through me. The music takes control. I'm no longer moving, but doing what the song tells me to do. The new radiohead song "I Might Be Wrong" has this effect on me. I can be alone in my house, windows closed, late at night, turn that song on loud and just feel it. That beat strikes a cord somewhere. The rise and fall, the hammering away... goes right through me. It's almost an out of body experience. The Drugs Don't Work, to quote the Verve, and I don't need them. The music is my drug itself. I get higher than anybody ever could being drug-inspired...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 5:07 PM
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National Baseball Hall of Fame
Today's Random Link of the Day brought to you by Random.com. This is where the greatest of the great live forever. Baseball holds such tremendous power over the American psyche. I can't watch a baseball game, from my little league team to the Red Sox without my heart beat quickening a bit, waiting for the rhythm of the game to sync in, the crack of the bat to come at the expected time. I know baseball. I could watch a game even if I were blind. It's ingrained in me. The greates of the great, the Williamses, the Mayeses, the Mantles, the Ruthes, touch our souls directly, fight epic battles with grace and sagicity. They are gone, but here they live forever.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 5:00 PM
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wMay 21, 2001 |
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What fools these mortals be....
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 11:12 PM
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5 days left till my high school career is over. jesus....
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:35 AM
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wMay 17, 2001 |
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I think the last person to die, of those I talked to today, would be Erin K. She has a grace and a strength about her that few people have. I've seen it in a comparable mode with women of extreme longevity. I was actually thinking about her future. She's an intriguing person. I wonder if she's fallen in love yet. I wonder if she'll fall in love while at colllege with some guy that will treat her badly. Then she'll go to her best guy friend for consolation, and they'll both realize that they are the ones that they've been looking for. Then maybe 50 years later, she'll lay that man to rest, and sit in her house thinking about all that she's seen and done. She'll go on living, not merely existing, because that's the best way to honor the man who loved her for so long. She'll go on, make an impact, and just keep going. She's a track star now. I think she's just going to keep running till she stops and sees that no one else in running with her anymore.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:28 AM
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Too cold by far. Hunger and fatigue are passive maladies, at least to me. Cold is an active, penetrating force that demoralizes as it permeates.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 12:06 AM
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wMay 15, 2001 |
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Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
by Robert Frost
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 11:50 PM
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Emelie is a master of the debate of the completely inconsequential. Like checkmarks.
I have work to do.
The fight goes on...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 10:45 PM
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Metahead.com
Formerly the most beautiful and inspirational site on the net, this artsy practical joke is like someone writing, post-armageddon, "BOOBIES" on the door of the Vatican...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 10:40 PM
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The Game Society: The New Empire of Gamers
Today's Random Link of the Day brought to you buy Random.com. I think this is where all the Dungeon's & Dragon's Fans of the world went after their hopes that the rest of the world would respect them becuase of the inspirational movie that they brought about were dashed due to horrible reviews and CGI that made people yawn. Man, whoever out there designs these websites should be shot. This guy has no clue as to color, text schemes, anything... Jesus. This is like my first webpage, but he has his own domain. That's so annoying.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 10:38 PM
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It seems God is not the only one who's sense of humor needs work.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 8:58 PM
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"Omnipotent fingertips." Does that mean I am a tool of God? If it does, then that means that everything I'm doing is sanctioned by the almighty. It occured to me the other day, maybe the only thing God has going over us is that he's better at math. Maybe he's just got a bigger computer than we can imagine. One the the tenants of chaos theory, I believe, is that there are always too many factors to factor in to trying to get an exact answer. Maybe God just knows all the factors, and can therefore compute how things will turn out. That said, he probably knows exactly what to do in order to change things the way he wants, if that's the type of deity that jives with you of course. So, really, if I have omnipotent fingertips and I'm a tool of God, the intended object of my actions is probably somewhere around the world, or in orbit perhaps? :) Example: God wants to make Mubutu Khaliza in Namibia, yet to be born, live a good life. If I'm a tool of God, then that guy I beeped at in my car this afternoon could get on a plane, be in a darker or perhaps more pensive mood than he would have otherwise. While talking to his stewardess, unchanged by god wind currents make the plane shutter just enough for the ice picture to slip and rotate in her hands, spilling the icy contents in his lap and on top of his laptop. The man I beeped at, rather than being annoyed, is taken by the way that the cylindrical ice cubes move and split open as they come near the heat exhaust of his humming computer. He immediately wonders, and God knows this because he can predict all the factors necessary for a given outcome, that if the heat of a regular chemical reaction were perfect, and a micro-capsule perfectly engineered to be sustainable, then human blood could give itself tylenol when it recognizes a fever. Maybe viruses have a particular heat signature, he thinks, and immediately starts scribbling, forgetting the ice, forgetting his sparking, smoking laptop. He goes on to forge a new direction in disease treatment. He irradicates AIDS, Cancer, etc and thus Mubutu Khaliza is born without AIDS becuase his mother was treated with a treatment developed by the guy I made think a new way because I beeped at him when he ran a stop sign on the other side of the world.
Maybe God's just really good at math. His sense of humor certainly needs work...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 8:35 PM
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Today's Posit: techno and raggae have biorhythmic properties.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 8:10 PM
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Bruin Club Tour: Sciences Library
Color coded by the pH level? Is this intellectualism run mad? Is this necessary? Or is it cute? Is it a declaration of pure pursuit of knowledge? Or is it cute and unnecessary? You be the judge. Check it out.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 8:05 PM
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"I was sitting in my room, I had just woken up (after 1.5 hrs of sleep - it was like 6), and the entire house was quiet, there was just a little breeze, and the light that came in was that aqua blue that only appears early in the morning or at sunsets late in summer? And I just sat there and didn't move. I wondered what would happen. and I just sat and stared at the floor. normally this'd just be a waste of time, but I was like deeply at peace and literally felt myself leave my body and go out my window and away into the sky. the first couple of times like my conscious self tried to stop it from happening and I almost fell off the bed, but then I just sort of let it happen. it was amazing. I got interrupted, my parents came back from breakfast, but it was so cool." --Last Night
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 1:42 AM
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It works!! God Bless American Ingenuity.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 1:38 AM
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wMay 13, 2001 |
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ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
ERROR 210ERROR 210
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That's all I've gotten for the last hour. I just want to upload and then go finish all my other work, but no. But no. That'd be far too simple...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 6:54 PM
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To follow up on something I was talking to a friend about the other day, there are infinite connections and coincidences in life that are highly ironic. In the course of one day a month ago, I met three people named Emily, in three seperate places, two of whom worked together but I didn't know that, the other one lived in the same building as Emily #1. This is fairly obvious coincidence. Some are far more subtle. Some, in order for me to explain them adequately, require an indepth knowledge of the inner workings of my mind. I compare these workings to gears: occasionally, the timing and alignment of the gears of my mind will shift, and the pattern that results is externally similar but vastly different thought pattern. I'm not bipolar, I don't randomly flip modes (an unintentional Busta Rhymes reference), but occasionally something will not necessitate, necessarily, but engender, I guess, a change in my thought patterns, a change in gears.
Some of the coincidences that I've been seeing lately, I've only seen because of the particular gears that were in motion. It's an odd sensation, rather like the external feeling one gets during meditation, to know that something would not have been seen had some one been in another mode of thinking. It makes one wonder how much one misses on a daily basis. This adds to my general feeling of being incapable of handling every aspect of life. My friend Jer, a metaphor wizard, compared my life to a box in which everything in my life fit except maybe 2 things. So I try to stuff those two things in three more things fall out. The process continues. This metaphor is so accurate that I think about it with about every decision I make.
I need a bigger box. Then I'll see all the coincidences and have much more to post here. :)
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 5:45 PM
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wMay 02, 2001 |
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THE SUNDAY TIMES: NEWS
What WILL they think of next? I have to wonder, though, if this technology exists on a microscopic scale, as in, it exists in some Londoner's house, and works when he's in direct contact with it, is the only thing preventing its application on a global scale the power of the receiver? Could this be the ultimate public opinion poll? Could a democracy emerge based entirely on this technology?
There's also the potential for abuse to consider, but like nanotechnology, the benefits would probably outweigh the risks. It's amazing, and I almost feel bad for how much Corporate America (TM) effects my everyday thought patterns, but truly the biggest risk is not taking one.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 9:37 PM
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wApril 30, 2001 |
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may sleep give ye all his rest....
lord, what fools these mortals be...
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 11:37 PM
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I'm tired, so this'll be quick.
That quick.
posted by
Brian J. McGuirk at 10:45 PM
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